Clandestine Moments
by Silindro
Summary: Complete. Vignettes surrounding moments behind the closed door of Han and Leia’s bedroom. Sequences range from lazy mornings to raunchy pillow fights and every happy and sad moment in between.
1. Under the Covers

a/n: This will be a series of vignettes surrounding moments behind the closed door of Han and Leia's bedroom. Sequences range from lazy mornings to raunchy pillow fights and every happy and sad moment in between.

Standard disclaimers apply.

**Clandestine Moments**--------

_I. Under the Covers_

Behind the closed door the steady beeping of a preset alarm woke one of the sleeping occupants of the bed from pleasant dreams. It was a morning not worth leaving bed Leia decided as the rays of light began to stream through the blinds and into the once-darkened bedroom. A lazy hand reached over and slapped the offending device from the table where it fell silent and broken on the floor.

She turned onto her stomach and pulled the heavy comforter over her head, willing the clock to turn back its hours and let her be still.

"Is that standard behavior for a member of the New Republic council?"

"Shut up, nerf herder."

Han chuckled and threw an arm over Leia's back, pulling her closer to his body. She nuzzled her nose into the crook of his neck, inhaling the musky scent of his skin.

"You smell like the Falcon," she murmured. "And the lower city cantina. You've been gambling again."

"Hey sweetheart, credits come and go but that alarm clock is never going to sound off the light of day again."

"Don't' worry, I'll have Threepio give the wake up call until I can find a replacement," she said in a drowsy voice.

"If that tin can comes in here he'll be going down to the trash compactor with that broken clock on the floor."

"Threepio isn't all that bad," she defended.

"That's what _you_ think."

Leia chuckled and snuggled in closer, enjoying the intimate moment buried underneath the blankets and away from the sunlight with her lover. It was a private oasis within Imperial City that no one else knew about. Their makeshift haven away from the chaos of everyday life.

"We need to get up," she groaned, "or we'll be late."

Han held tight onto her body as she tried to sit up and disrupt the good start to their morning. He tugged her back down into a more relaxed position that suited his need for a pillow and her need for the close contact that she always craved from him.

"They can wait five more minutes," he yawned while settling back down.

"Alright," she agreed absent mindedly as she became more tempted with the idea of closing her eyes for just a few more minutes…

A few minutes turned into ten.

That ten turned into twenty.

That twenty turned into three hours.

"_Han!_" Leia screeched as her eyes snapped open. Still in bed, the morning had passed by unnoticed due to her husband's persuasive manner of speaking and touching. Cursing her carelessness, Leia threw the covers off of her head and began to step out of bed.

"Where do you think you're going?" Han asked with a hand around her wrist.

"I'm getting dressed," she replied, trying to pull away from his grip. "There's no doubt in my mind that I've already missed this morning's meeting on diplomacy ethics with the-"

"Leia, shut up."

Startled at his frankness, she turned to face his smug grin.

"Get back over here," he commanded.

"Han-"

"Now."

Leia put her feet back in the bed and allowed herself to be pulled into the middle and against Han's chest.

"You aren't going to work today," he said matter-of-factly. "I'm not going to work either."

"But-"

"Do you know what today is?"

"Aside from a very busy and potentially wasted day?"

"It's my birthday," he replied.

"Oh god, I can't believe I forgot," she cursed. "Happy birthday."

He accepted a lengthy birthday kiss in repentance.

"To glorify this wretched occasion I've taken the next two days off and so have you. It's already been cleared, so don't get twisted up. Your work will be there when you get back. You're on _my time_ now."

"And what do you propose we do on _your_ time?" she grinned mischievously.

"Celebrate."

* * *

a/n: Yeah yeah, I know. I cut out all the fun. What can I say, vignettes just aren't the place for 'hanky panky'. Hahahaha I love that phrase. More tales from the unknown to come soon. 

Leave me some love (and some ideas!)

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


	2. An Unsuspecting Doorstop

**Clandestine Moments**------

_II. An Unsuspecting Doorstop_

Behind the closed door a concerned man sat hunched over in his favorite chair, his face buried in his hands. He was a sad thing, dressed up in his suit with places to be and people to see, but no one that really cared that he _didn't_ care to be going out. Especially not in prim and proper military attire that he thought he'd given up years before with his official military career. He was a smuggler, not a general.

He sighed deeply with the resignation of someone doomed to an eternal existence in the fiery pits of wardrobe hell.

From the closet came a frustrated roar that could only be described using words in languages that Han didn't speak. It brought a marginal feeling of satisfaction to know that his wife wasn't having a much better time than himself. At least he could wallow in his sorrows on time. She was wallowing in her sorrows while pulling dresses and things over her head.

"Han, have you seen my white shoes?"

Looking at the closet door, he wondered how she could possibly expect him to give an accurate answer. The woman owned at least thirty pairs of shoes, half of which were white.

"Which white ones?"

"The ones with the straps on the side!" she yelled.

A pained expression crossed Han's face. His patience was already being tested with the suit and the very idea of being put on display for everyone to see. He'd had this discussion with Leia the previous night to no avail. She insisted that he make an appearance because she wasn't going down there alone. There would be too many people talking if she didn't have her escort. She'd gone as far as threatening a night or four on the couch if he didn't attend.

Through the gaps in his fingers Han could see a white strap peeking out from underneath his chair. Reaching down he grabbed hold of the exact shoe that Leia was on the hunt for in the closet.

"Hey sweetheart," he called while walking over to the closet to take her the shoes, "I've found your shoes."

"Oh really, where-"

The heavy door opened swiftly and caught Han in the face, promptly knocking him unconscious as he fell to the floor.

"Oh no," Leia gasped, dropping the jewelry in her hands as she knelt by her husband's side. "Han wake up, wake up."

She slapped him repeatedly in the face in an attempt to revive him. Deciding that a cold washcloth would help, she ran to the bathroom to get just that. As she came out she saw his eyes flutter and legs begin to move. Rushing back to his side she held him onto the floor with the help of the Force.

"Stay still, you may have a head injury," she cautioned.

"What the hell happened?" he asked while reaching up to touch his face.

"The door hit you," she explained. "I opened it while you were walking over. How do you feel?"

"Like I'm gonna be late for the party," he remarked.

"Can you stand? Let me help you up."

Together they reached the bed with little incident, though the dizziness and nausea of a possible concussion were beginning to affect Han's head and stomach. He laid his head back on the pillow and closed his eyes, hoping that the throbbing pain of his headache would quickly go away.

"Oh god I feel terrible," Leia groaned.

"How do you think _I_ feel?" Han retorted.

"I'm so sorry for hitting you in the face with the door. You just came walking over and I didn't know-"

Han held up his hand to silence her fast words.

"Don't talk," he commanded. "Just… don't talk."

The room was silent as ordered while Han tried to suffer through the pain of his injury. His forehead was already bruised and a trickle of blood had dried near his hairline.

"You're going to be late," he warned, taking a quick glance at the bedside clock.

"I'm not going," she said while scooting closer to his body. She lay down beside him with her head propped on her hand. Looking down at his face and the injuries she'd caused with her recklessness she felt the guilt come rushing back full force. If she hadn't been so commanding then he never would have gotten hurt.

"What do you mean you're not going? I thought this was important to you."

"You're more important than some social gathering of the most pompous people in inter-galactic politics," she replied.

"You're in that social elite yourself, princess," he reminded.

"Shut up or I'll give you another head wound."

"I'm not entirely sure that's a bad idea given the state of things right now," he grinned. "I get to miss the formal entrance of every planet's most notorious lawmakers to spend time in bed with a great lookin' woman. Not too shabby if you ask me."

"Hans to yourself, Solo, hands to yourself."

"Don't' worry, I'm in too much pain to talk you out of your clothes tonight. Now tomorrow could be a different story…"

* * *

a/n: Wooo, the beginning of this one tore me up. The ending surprised me since this wasn't what I set out to write. Consider it a back to school present for most of you. More to definitely come soon. Maybe. Whenever I get to it, really.

Check out my other Star Wars stories while you're bored and reading this filthy romance trash. Get to it!

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


	3. Less than You Thought I Needed

a/n: **Puzzling question and possible reward in the author's note at the end.**

Rollercoaster of emotion and turnabout ahead.

**Clandestine Moments **-----------

_IV. Less than You Thought I Needed_

Behind the closed door the clock chimed a sad note announcing the time. He was supposed to have been home hours ago according to the official docking schedule uploaded from his last checkpoint. He was on his way back home to see her, to say that he missed her and loved her. But he was hours late and she had never felt more alone.

A half-empty glass of red wine was her only comfort, sparkling in the dark with the lights of the bustling city outside reflecting empty promises and a broken heart. She cried a silent tear and closed her eyes as she lay back on the bed, slipping into a peaceful solace away from the hurt of the world.

He found her there in the morning just as the rays of the rising sun peeked through crevices of the tall buildings that overshadowed their home in the Imperial Palace. She was like a porcelain doll in her tender state.

Sitting down on the edge of the bed woke Leia from her restless sleep and she opened her eyes, blinking away the haze of slumber. She looked at him with contempt before closing her eyes again. Rolling onto her side, she shunned his presence in a hurtful display of emotion.

"Leia..." he breathed. "Leia don't-"

"_You_ don't," she spat out hatefully.

He sat down on the edge of the bed, careful to leave a foot of distance between their bodies. There were times when even he knew not to test her patience. She had endured enough pain and anguish at his thoughtlessness to last seven lifetimes. Even he knew when enough was enough.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," he whispered. "I never meant to hurt you."

"You never mean to do a lot of things, Han, but you can't stop yourself. Why do you come back here if you know this isn't where you want to be?"

He sighed heavily and buried his head in his hands.

"Because I need you," he answered honestly.

She laughed mirthlessly, scoffing his response. There was no reason for her to believe anything that he said, let alone give in to the implication that she should forgive him. There was no room in her heart for forgiveness. He had taken all of the forgiveness that she had to give.

Han could hear the telltale sniffle that indicated the start of her emotional breakdown. He watched her shoulders shake with her sobs. It broke his heart to see or hear her cry, but he decided in the end that it was nothing less than what he deserved.

Deciding that he couldn't take anymore suffering, he stood up and began to walk away. His hand touched the doorknob when she spoke softly in the silence. Her voice was strained, tearful, and very afraid.

"Don't leave again," she whispered.

"I thought that's what you wanted."

"It's what you forced me to believe," she answered.

"Damnit," Han cursed under his breath. He leaned his forehead against the door and let out a heavy, frustrated sigh. It seemed that nothing he ever did was right.

From across the room Leia could feel waves of emotional pain flowing from Han's dejected spirit. She hadn't realized the sincerity of his pain until she had felt it for herself. Quietly standing, she walked across the room and pressed herself to his back.

"You aren't a failure," she whispered into his ear.

"Don't lie," he spat. "It isn't your style. Besides, I don't need your pity."

"But you do need _me_ if I remember correctly."

Han slammed his hand against the door, startling Leia and making her jump slightly in surprise. Turning around and grabbing Leia's arms tightly, he pulled her to within inches of his face.

"I'll be fine on my own," he ground out from behind clenched teeth.

"But I won't be," she cried. "Every time you leave you take a piece of me with you. If you keep disappearing like this there's going to be nothing of me left."

His anger melted away at her admission.

Sliding down to the floor, he cradled Leia to his chest, rocking her back and forth in his arms as she cried. Even if he couldn't offer her any promises to stay he could offer her what little comfort he had left to give. And there with her he could take some comfort for himself as well.

* * *

a/n: Alright, for those of you with the new box set of Star Wars dvds, tell me the name of the song that they play during the opening menu screen of Episode One. It's sad and lonely and I'm dying to download it. The first (or only) person to tell me what it is will get whatever idea they have running around in their head written into a fic.

That note aside, thanks to everyone who's been reviewing. It really makes my day a lot better when I see that you guys are liking the stories. I only hope that this chapter and the ones to come will meet your seal of approval.

**And to KnightedRogue**: _Y'know, the post-rescue pre-Endor thing was the second place that came to mind when I was thinking of times when they got to do it. Bespin just made so much more sense in timing and characterization. You gotta realize that Leia's impulsive and sometimes she does things irrationally just to keep people guessing (I.E. kissing Luke, shooting her way into the garbage compactor to rescue her own self in ANH). It just seems to make sense to me that she'd sleep with Han so quickly in their relationship because she thinks that he won't think she'd do it._ _It isn't a matter of 'will he leave will he stay' as much as it is about her._

Make weird sense? Anyway, I'd like to hear anymore of your takes on this matter if you have any to give.

Anyone else feel free to throw in your comments as well.

Happy chapter next.

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


	4. Life's Greater Philosophy

a/n: It didn't even cross my mind that the last chapter could have been something out of the middle of NJO. I've never read NJO. I'm just now reading Ambush at Corellia.

By the way, **KNIGHTEDROGUE**, I wrote you a story. You better get around to reading and reviewing it. It's on my author's page. Horribly almost-smutty piece of filth. 'The Pain of Consequence' for anyone who is (_and everyone should be_) interested.

And 'Jane' brought up an interesting point. Up until Cloud City, Leia had never worn anything that wasn't white. Can anyone say symbolism? (For those of you who don't get it, white is the color of purity)

**Clandestine Moments**----

_IV. Life's Greater Philosophy_

Behind the closed door sat a bedside table with a small bedside lamp placed upon it. The lamp was no bigger than any other lamp, and it gave off no more light than a bedside lamp was made to give. But Leia's bedside lamp was the vilest thing that Han had ever seen and night after night it caused him more grief than he could express to his new wife.

Laying on his side away from the light, Han scrunched his eyes tight. He tried to pretend that there was no lamp, no faint glow coming from the other side of the room. He just wanted some sleep, but the sound of turning pages and Leia's pen scratching on paper kept him wide away.

"Leia."

"What?"

"Stop that."

"Stop what?"

Han rolled over onto his back, looking up at her with tired eyes. She stopped writing long enough to glance over and question his frustration with a look of her own.

"Can't you turn that light off long enough to let me fall asleep?"

"If I did that then I couldn't finish these notes," she answered haughtily. "You know I have to speak in front of the council in the morning."

"All the more reason for you to turn off that light and get some sleep."

Leia didn't answer, she instead continued to write and ignore Han and his mumbled curses. She had more important things to do than sleep. Sleep was a commodity that she couldn't afford when there were more pressing things to get done.

On Han's side of the bed he had decided that enough was enough. Gripping the edge of his pillow, he waited for the right moment to catch Leia off guard. When that moment came, he yanked the pillow from beneath his head and brought it crashing down onto Leia's note pad.

"What did you do that for?" she screeched.

Feeling that his very brash decision to personally discontinue Leia's work was the right thing to do, he prided himself in smashing the pillow into her lap again, knocking the paper onto the floor below. Leia gasped and reached over to grab the pillow, holding it still between them.

"Han, that was very childish," she reprimanded.

The insult did nothing to hurt the smuggler's feelings, it only pushed him to do it again with the pillow that he had pulled from behind Leia's back.

"Thief!" she yelled, tossing her pen out of the way. She leaned forward on her knees to grab fully the pillow that Han had discarded when he had stolen her own. She held onto the corners with both hands and swung the cushion at full force into Han's chest. It made a dull, fluffy thud on contact.

"Transporter of outlawed goods, sweetheart. Get it right," he grinned, sitting up to bash his wife with his own feathery weapon of destruction.

Quick Force-tinted reflexes had her blocking Han's blow as his next hit brought the pillow very close to the side of her head. She knocked the pillow out of his hand and onto the bed. Seeing her moment of opportunity arise, she hit him with a succession of strikes that had him on his back once more with a giggling Leia straddling his waist.

"Well if you feel that strongly about your work then I'm sure we can make some sort of compromise," he smirked as his hands traveled up Leia's legs.

"I don't understand you sometimes," Leia said.

"What's not to understand?"

"Well first you want me to turn the light off so you can get some sleep, now it seems to me that you aren't so tired anymore."

"What gives you that idea?"

"Oh I don't know," she said while leaning forward to nibble at his throat. "I've just got that feeling deep down."

"You've got one hell of an intuition there, princess."

Not one to be left out of the games, Han flipped Leia over onto her back. Kissing her slowly and sensually, he wondered briefly if all of their fights would end up so well. Kiss and make up was a good philosophy to live by.

Reaching over, he flipped off the lamp and shrouded the room in darkness.

* * *

a/n: Really pleased with the ending of this vignette. Moreso than I have been with any of my recent published works. Hope you enjoyed it. You all got your raunchy pillow fight (kind of) and maybe I'll get some nice reviews in return.

Check out my other Star Wars stuff while you're out and about.

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


	5. Contagion

a/n: They're called vignettes cause they're _supposed_ to be short, yo. And I don't give a timeline for these stories because there really isn't one. It's all post-RotJ, that much I can say. All out of order as well. Just gotta go with it.

**Clandestine Moments** ---

_V. Contagion _

Behind the closed door was an unofficial quarantine sickbay that Leia Organa Solo had locked herself and her husband within. It was a sad excuse for private time together, but being the Alderaanian ambassador and a high-ranking official within the New Republic meant taking any sad excuse you could get to spend time with your family. Besides, Han was sick and there wasn't much she could do in the way of concentration because she was so worried about him. At least that's what she had explained to Mon Mothma at the time.

Now that she was home and taking care of the helpless she wasn't so sure that she wanted to be there. Han was a fully grown man, but he was acting the part of a four year old. Leia assumed it was because she was there to take care of him. He was exploiting her.

All morning she had been playing the part of personal servant. 'Get me a drink, would you?' 'Can I have some soup?' 'It's a little chilly in here, could you get me another blanket?' Finally things had calmed to a level that allowed her to get even the most minute pieces of work done while still allowing her to be attentive to his needs.

Buried deep under the blankets with the sheets pulled up to his nose, Han was trying his best not to be too contagious 'cause you don't need the flu on top of everything else, sweetheart'. His eyes had been blinking slowly, fighting sleep for a while. Leia didn't understand why, there was no reason for him to stay awake.

She glanced up briefly and met his bloodshot eyes with a glint of compassion. She noticed that the color was ever so slightly beginning to come back into his face, making the dark circles under his eyes look not so dark anymore. He still looked dreadful, though.

"Go to sleep, Han," she ordered, turning back to her work.

In return she got a muffled, sniffly nose sound from under the covers.

"That's no reason to stay awake," she said absently, marking notes on the side of her notepad. She didn't seem to notice or mind that he hadn't given her a real answer.

"Leia," he said in a croaky voice, "you don't have to stay here with me."

Inwardly she groaned, having been over this with him twice already. He didn't want her to feel like she had to stay by his side, but he wanted reassurance that she wasn't going to leave him alone and helpless in the apartment for the afternoon. Setting her notes on the bedside table, she focused all of her attention on him.

"Han, I'm not going anywhere," she said while scooting her chair closer to the bed. He moved further toward the opposite side of the bed to keep distance between them.

"Don't come any closer," he coughed.

"Oh Han," she grinned. "Don't worry so much. It's just a little cough."

"And a little sneezing and fever and cold chills that would remind you of that nice little stay on Hoth."

"You're overreacting," she chided while standing up and putting her hands on the edge of the bed.

"Stay away from me," he warned.

"What are you going to do about it?" she asked, sitting down on the mattress.

"Leia…"

"Han…"

Completely disregarding his warnings, she lifted the blankets and crawled under, cuddling up next to him as he nearly fell onto the floor. Wrapping her arms around his torso, she held him close to keep him from getting away. Feeling terribly ill, he quickly gave up trying to fight.

"Come here you old pirate," she said, squeezing him slightly. "I'll make you feel better."

Han turned his head away from her, coughing heavily enough to further pain his already sore chest. Whatever it was he had picked up from whatever species had been sick in his vicinity certainly hurt more than that case of the Corellian flu he could remember suffering through as a child. If things kept up the way they were then he'd have a chest full of broken ribs and there would be no tissue left on Coruscant.

"I feel terrible," he commented as his coughs died down into his stuffy chest.

"You'll get better," she soothed, bringing a hand up to his forehead to check his temperature. "Your fever is starting to come down."

"Just when I was getting used to the burn of this eternal hell feeling," he sniffed.

Leia ran her fingers through Han's hair, draping her arm protectively over his chest in the process. He seemed to calm down and relax a bit more with the motion of her fingertips. She hummed a little melody in hopes that maybe he'd fall asleep without a fuss. Sometimes she didn't really mind mothering him so much.

After a few moments she began to relax herself, nestling her face against Han's neck. His chest, though still sickly sounding, was comfortably rising and falling with each strained breath he took. His little snores came and went and then came some more and then Leia followed close behind into oblivion.

* * *

a/n: Hmm… This one kind of came out of nowhere. Oh well, it's here now. And since school is starting to overpower my time, don't expect much for a while. I'll write when I can, but just don't get your hopes up. Messaging me (**LLsiLindroLL on AIM**) and bugging the shit out of me works great, though.

Thank you sooo so so much for all of the reviews that I've been receiving. You don't understand how much they really do mean to me. Aside from keeping me in the writing game, they keep me from killing everyone nearby by putting me in a happy mood. So yeah, thanks. And especially thank you to those of you that go read my other stuff as well.

Onasi26 – What does 'El Dag Yo' mean? It's been plaguing my mind since you first started reviewing. And it's on your author's page too…

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


	6. Nighttime Terrors

**Clandestine Moments**---

_VI. Nighttime Terrors_

Behind the closed door a child stood beside his parents' bed, his head hung low and his feet shuffling back and forth as if he didn't know what to do. He was scared, a nightmare had shaken him awake and pushed him down the hall into somewhere safe. And standing next to his mother's sleeping form, he wasn't so sure that she was the best person to wake up in the middle of the night. He knew she was busy during the day.

Tiptoeing to the other side of the bed he stood next to his father. Han was breathing deeply with soft snores escaping every other breath. His eyes darted back and forth fast under his eyelids and he didn't respond to the first call of his name. Anakin pushed on his arm, shaking the limb slightly, but to no avail.

"Dad," he whispered, scooting close to his father's face. The four-year-old stood at eye level with the sleeping man, staring him in the face with the seriousness of a child much older. "Dad!"

Han startled awake, opening his eyes to the sight of his son beside him, looking quite sheepish. He pushed himself up on one arm and blinked the fuzziness out of his eyes.

"Wha's goin' on?" he slurred.

"I had a nightmare," Anakin confessed.

Han sighed heavily. The boy had been suffering through nightmares for weeks now. It wasn't the first time he had come running for comfort.

"C'mere," Han said, holding the blanket up.

Anakin crawled onto the bed and situated himself between his parents. Leia, woken up by the movement, rolled over and saw to it that her son was comfortable. He settled down and closed his eyes.

"Another one?" she asked quietly.

"If he doesn't get some real sleep soon we're gonna have a real problem on our hands," Han worried. "The poor kid's already afraid to go to sleep."

Leia ran a hand through her son's soft hair, smoothing it off of his forehead in a motherly manner. She ran her finger down his cheek, bothered by the boy's sleeping troubles. It wasn't healthy for a Force-sensitive child to go through such stressful times, especially at such a young age.

"Things'll be alright," Han reassured in the dark. "We've made it this far, haven't we?"

Closing her own eyes she wondered what the future would hold for her son.

In his quiet slumber Anakin dreamed.

---

a/n: Yeah I know, long time no update. Things have been so busy as of late. Lots of homework and junk. Thought I'd post this and let you know that I'm not dead and not dormant.

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


	7. Sincerity

a/n: This one has absolutely nothing to do with anything canon that I can think of. If you're looking for a canonical place to shove it, then I guess somewhere NJO would be about right. But I don't think Han is that much of a sleazeball, even if he did completely disregard his family for the allure of the shadow life.

Maybe next time I'll do something funny.

**Clandestine Moments** ---

_VII. Sincerity_

Behind the closed door were the shattered pieces of a broken heart. It was broken because there was no sincerity left in the world and it was shattered because she had done it to herself. She had forced him into the arms of temptation, undressed him and put him into bed with that other woman even. All because of what, a few nights spent away from home working on this and that and things that didn't matter but at the same time meant the world and well being to everyone else. And all _for_ what? She really didn't know.

Laying there in the dark she wondered why she did the things she did. Why she chose to act in the manner that was so characteristically her that it pushed everyone else away.

Of course he didn't know that she knew about the other woman. He was Han Solo, a smuggler that was invariably good at hiding anything and everything, including his secrets. But she knew about that little tramp. She knew about the secret meetings in the Falcon and in the cheap, lower city apartment.

Turning over on her side, she stared at the face of her husband. He was sleeping soundly beside her, completely unaware of anything but his own dreams and desires while she bottled up and threw herself out to sea.

"You were supposed to rescue me," she whispered.

His eyes fluttered behind his eyelids and briefly she wondered if he would wake up and say those small words that he always meant as comfort. She never took them as anything more than a clever scheme to fake trust. They were good at that.

"Leia?" His groggy voice pierced the quiet and she felt the icy grip of fear wrap its cold hands around her heart. Had he heard her softly spoken words? "What time is it?"

His hands fumbled around for the clock on the nightstand behind himself. She grabbed his hand, quieting the movement and bringing it back to rest at his side. He sighed heavily and closed his eyes.

"Go back to sleep, Han," she said tiredly.

"Love you," he mumbled in an almost sincere voice.

Leia said nothing.

--- ---

a/n: Nothing too special bout this, just something that I concocted while I was being depressed again. Thanks for all the reviews that you guys have been leaving. It really does make my life that little bit better.

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


	8. The BeforeTime

A/n: A ton-ton is the animal that Luke and Han rode in the beginning of Empire Strikes Back. Both of theirs died. And Winter is Leia's handmaid of sorts from the books.

**Clandestine Moments**---

VIII: The Before-Time 

Behind the closed door a little boy sat with his hands over his eyes. His chubby little fingers twitched involuntarily as the suspense got to him. A grin brightened his face as he giggled at everything and nothing really at all.

"Where's my Anakin?"

A blue eye peeked out from behind his coverage and then shut itself tight.

"No see Ani!" he screeched happily. "No see Ani, Mama!"

Leia smiled at her son's playful games. Hiding was his favorite, though she couldn't bring herself to tell him that just because he couldn't see her, she could still see him. His toddler mind wasn't that developed yet.

Grabbing his hands, she pulled his fingers away from his face. Immediately his eyes opened and he laughed loudly at his mother.

"Got you!" Leia reached for Anakin and picked him up, holding him at arm's length above her body as she fell back against the soft mattress.

"Fly, Mama, fly!"

She gently swayed the boy around in the air until her arms were tired, and then she gently landed him on the bed. His face was red with giggles and smiles, and his eyes were bright with happiness.

"If only things could stay just like this," she sighed.

Anakin pounded his hands on the bed, bored with the lack of amusement.

"Play, Mama!"

"Baby, I'm tired now," she grinned. "Mama needs rest."

"Now I won't take that as an excuse later," Han said as he entered the room.

"I wasn't expecting you back until later this afternoon," Leia said as Han threw himself face first down beside her.

"Da!" Anakin wailed excitedly. He then began to climb onto his father's back like he was a pack animal.

"Ton!" he shouted, bouncing up and down. Han gave Leia a questioning look.

"Luke's been showing the kids picture stories again," she explained. "He must think you're a ton-ton."

"I'm gonna have to have a talk with your brother," he murmured.

"Let the kids have their fun," Leia said. "It won't be long before before they're be putting together their own lightsabers and rushing off to defend the galaxy."

"Let's get them through primary school first."

"Where are the twins, anyway?"

"Winter took them up to the terrace for a walk," Han yawned. "Shoulda sent Anakin with them."

"He's getting tired," Leia noticed.

Anakin's eyes had begun to droop and his actions had slowed. Instead of the bouncing child, he sat on his father's back, drawing little circles with his fingers. Leia pulled him down and laid him on the bed. He fussed at being moved, but closed his eyes and resigned himself to sleep.

"My sleepy little Jedi," Leia said, running her fingers through his soft hair.

"And my sleepy pilot," she chuckled, leaning over to kiss Han's forehead.

And then there was a sleepy Alderaanian princess and a sleepy afternoon spent quietly napping together.

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a/n: It's been a while since I've written a chapter for this story, but the idea came to me while in class. I thought it was cute.

And now, a word if you don't mind. I just don't think it's fair that I get let's say a hundred hits for a story and only five reviews. What's the deal? If you're reading this then it's your duty! You're gonna find yourself out of stuff to read if you guys don't pick up the good comments on stories that are deserving (and not deserving) of the reviews.

Humor me and clicky clicky that little button at the bottom. We'll all be a lot happier if you do.

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


	9. The Music Box

a/n: This chapter will make much more sense if you've read 'Care to Wager?'. Some of the dialogue involves that story.

Standard disclaimers apply.

**Clandestine Moments** ---

_VIIII. The Music Box_

Behind the closed door a slow song perfect for dancing emitted from a shelf-sized music box made by an Alderaanian craftsman that had been long forgotten since the days of the planet's destruction. It was a finely craft music box made from a dark wood that had been carved into a picture of flowers and a palace only truly captured by the ones that had lived to remember it.

The music box was as old as the owner herself, and the sweet melody contained therein drifted out to familiar ears. She embraced the song with all the longing that her tears would let her cry from dry eyes. Yet she was grateful that her music box, her most cherished childhood treasure had withstood the destruction of Alderaan in a thoughtful move by her father when he had packed it in her traveling bags just before she had set out for another round of Rebel going-ons disguised as diplomatic charges.

In the middle of the room Leia stood with her husband, both of which had an infant child in their arms. It was naptime for Jaina and Jacen but their tiny eyes had refused to close. The weary parents had finally resorted to walking around with the children when Leia had remembered her prized possession sitting unused on the shelf.

Opening the lid had started a trinkling of a song that the princess hadn't heard in years. She had sung along softly the unspoken words, swaying gently in time in a long forgotten rhythm that Breha Organa had danced to with her adopted daughter long long ago.

Han had joined in the rocking motion, hoping that his wife's idea caught on with the twins.

"They should know something of Alderaan," Leia said, sighing deeply. "If I don't pass on my culture and traditions then who will?"

"By that standard, does that mean I get to teach them all about smuggling and the finer aspects of Sabaac?"

"Sabaac is not a culture," Leia said dryly.

"No, but it's a Han Solo tradition," he grinned. "We all owe our lives to the Falcon, and if it weren't for Sabaac then I wouldn't have the Falcon at all. And if I remember correctly, you didn't think the game was all that bad when we played…"

Leia's cheeks darkened slightly at the mention of the fateful card game.

"That was a long time ago," she protested.

"All the more reason for a repeat," he leered.

Jacen let out a cranky gurgle, pulling Han back to the current task. He put a quieting hand on the child's back, rubbing comforting circles there. Immediately the boy's whimpers turned into content cooing, and Han visibly relaxed. Years of smuggling had never trained him for the position of father, and the nine months leading up to their twins' birth had been so busy he'd forgotten to take the time to learn about parenting before actually attempting the job.

"You're getting better at that," Leia said quietly.

"If you can do this parent thing then so can I," he grinned. "After all we've been through, a couple of babies aren't such a difficult thing."

"You would think."

Jaina flexed her tiny fingers against Leia's chest, prompting the new mother to look at her daughter. She leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of her head in an attempt to comfort the child into sleep. They had been carrying around the wakeful babies for far longer than needed.

"Are you sure that music box ever put you to sleep?" Han asked with a skeptical look.

"My father said he used it many times to help me nap when I wasn't much older than these two."

"They seem quite resistant to its powers."

"Do they?" Leia asked while looking at Jacen as he let out an infant-sized yawn.

"It's working," Han whispered gladly, peering down into his son's fading eyes.

Leia smiled, looking down at Jaina and noting that her eyes were already closed in sleep.

"Should we go put them down?" Han whispered so as not to wake the twins.

"No," Leia answered, still dancing to the soft music. "I think I'd like to stay just like this a little longer."

Han nodded and they continued to dance.

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a/n: Thanks to all of you who have been cheering this series on. I appreciate everything that you guys say and it brightens my day just that little bit more when I get your reviews. And I was quite surprised that you guys enjoyed the dialogue in 'Sanctuary' as much as you did.

Seriously, thanks. And go read stuff by suezahn (Susan Zahn) if you haven't discovered her masterpieces yet. She's brilliant. Encourage her to write things.

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


	10. Endings

a/n: Nameless obvious characters add some sadness to stories, I think. Not that I wanted this to be sad, but it sets a mood that I thought was really different in a weird way. Comp death killed three previous versions of this chapter, and none of them started or ended like the one here. Hope this meets your expectations.

**Clandestine Moments** ---

_X. Endings_

Standing in the open doorway, a tall man in a long, flowing robe watched the man and woman that stood together by the window, enjoying each others silent company.

In his own time he had done such a simple thing, enjoyed the company of a lover not only because you loved them, but because you loved everything _about_ them. He had spent time with his beloved in such a manner, quietly watching the city in its business as everyone else's lives flew past without a second glance at the people in the window. But that had been long ago and the past was buried in all of her glory on a planet far away that he would never again see or touch.

The man by the window, Han, took in a deep breath and sighed happily. The woman, Leia, smiled and leaned further back against her partner. It was clear that the routine was familiar, each motion echoing the motion of the other in a rhythm that was like a dance, only no one else heard the music, and no one else knew the steps. It fit.

"They'll be home soon," she said softly into the silence of the room.

"Guess we better enjoy ourselves while it lasts," he smiled.

The man in the robe chuckled to himself. He knew the feeling of borrowed time all too well. In his own day and age he had lived for the stolen moments and the simple affections that no one else was meant to see. He had loved and he had lost. And what he watched now was a testament to the good that came out of mistakes and sorrow that had been enacted for the wrong reasons.

"Do you think things will be like this when they've all grown and gone away?"

Han turned his princess around and locked arms to hold her in place. Fixing her with a wicked stare, he could only hope that they would always be as they were.

The man in the robe knew all too well that things changed.

"Things don't always stay the same," Han said. "Gotta make the best of the time you got left."

"Always the optimist," she grinned.

"Hey, I'd say things worked out pretty well for me. I have you, don't I?"

"There's that Solo charm."

The man in the doorway recalled similar conversations from his memory in a different time and different place. He remembered the same smile, the same blush that he saw mirrored on the woman before him.

A door release in the other room caught the two lovers by almost-surprise. A flurry of footsteps carried three children with dark hair and lively spirits into the bedroom and into the waiting arms of their parents. Moments of praise over accomplishments was followed by the declaration from the smallest of the Solo children, a child named after a corrupt soul born again in redemption.

"There's a man in the doorway," Anakin proclaimed.

Four eyes turned to stare at an empty space, void of life forms.

"There's no one there," one of the twins said in response.

"Yes there is," Anakin protested. "But he's leaving."

Leia looked down at her youngest son, curious at his complete lack of guilt as far as lies were concerned. She knew the truth when it was being told.

"Forgiveness," he stated with a nod. "And love. Always love."

Han gave a worried glance to his wife, but her gaze flickered back to the doorway and the translucent, fading shape of a man that she had never fully understood. Cold shame and the pain of loss drifted through the room in a slow, yet urgent manner.

"Yes," Leia breathed. "Everything."

Whispers of happiness and joy and the peaceful resolution of a life half lived in sorrow blanketed the room. Even Han who was not sensitive to such elemental feelings could almost relax in knowing that something almost spiritual had taken place. And the man, Anakin, who had watched silently from the doorway, disappeared from sight. His memory lived on.

Forgiveness. Love. Endings

--- --- ---

a/n: Yes, that concludes Clandestine Moments. I hope you all enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Many thanks to everyone who reviewed. It made me feel thirteen kinds of good inside to know that I made someone's day. And even though you never reviewed (**HEATHENS**), I appreciate the hit count. But don't think that means you're off the hook (**DEVILS**).

Look for more stories in the future.

It's a fanfiction sin to read without reviewing.


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